Today,
January 18th, is the birthday of one of the
world’s most special women. My grandmother Vera Gottfried Norman was a symbol
of strength and courage in a world full of obstacles. Vera’s life was set against unlikely
odds when she was born to Jewish parents just before the onset of the
Holocaust. Vera’s father, Oscar, was the youngest of ten siblings who were all
eventually killed in the atrocities of the Nazi regime. There were horrors
beyond belief taking place outside every window and on every street corner. The
Nazis shot and killed Vera’s brother Carleys before her own eyes when they were
asked for their papers on a street corner yet had none to show. Vera’s entire
immediate family was murdered, and Vera was the sole survivor. To protect her,
Vera’s parents had given her to the Nuns with whom she lived in a convent in
Antwerp, Belgium until the war was over. Vera remembered a man who she thought
was her father occasionally coming to dance with her. He eventually stopped
coming, and Vera felt discouraged to ask about him. Vera was a “hidden child”:
the sisters raised her as though she was an orphan and a catholic, but even
this effort could not fully keep her out of harm. She wandered the streets
during the day to prevent being caught when the Nazis checked the convents. Vera
remembered many of the catholic principles she had been taught while living in
the convent and applied them to her later life.
When the
war was finally over, the Red Cross found Vera and told her that she had family
waiting for her in the United States. Before she was allowed to immigrate to
the US, Vera spent many months in a health center recovering from a lung
illness, and we are still unsure whether she ever fully recovered from this
condition. After she was released from the health center, Vera took a long sea
voyage across the Atlantic upon the S.S. Constitution. She remembered that a
family was paid to take care of her, but they did not. She remembers that they
were not kind to her and did not think she could understand their language.
However, she was tri-lingual, and could in fact understand their conversations.
Upon Vera’s
arrival to New York, she was greeted by complete strangers who claimed to be
her paternal cousins. Vera lived in New York City for a few years before moving
to the suburbs of Connecticut where she went to school, got married, and had
three children. After 12 years of marriage, her relationship ended, and she
moved away to another town with her children and the love of her life, Michael.
Vera graduated from the University of
Connecticut as Summa Cum Laude and as a Junior Year Phi Beta Kappa. She later
went on to earn her Master’s degree.
Vera was a brilliant thinker with a passion for learning. She always
pursued her love of philosophy and history. When I was unable to attend school,
Oma brought school to me. Twice per week she came to my house to read and
discuss history, poetry, and current events with me. My Oma wanted me to hold
on to my love of learning and constantly encouraged me to continue to set goals
and never give up hope, no matter how sick I was. She inspired me to keep
pushing on in spite of my illness and insisted that I pursue higher education even
though I have medical limitations. My Oma believed strongly that there are many ways to obtain your goals; you just have to find them.
Vera’s struggles in life were many, especially when she was
diagnosed with terminal cancer at the young age of 67. During the last years of
her life, she surrounded herself by the love of her husband, children,
grandchildren, and friends. Vera loved her family more than anything. She
reminded us frequently that life was very fragile but meant to be enjoyed. Vera
spoke of her choice to be happy even in the face of never knowing her parents,
leaving her home at the convent in Belgium, and starting all over in a new
country. We will always admire her thoughtful insights and honest advice.
Vera’s wisdom lives on in all who knew her and her love shines through her
children and her grandchildren. Happy Birthday, Oma. We love you and miss you
so.
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